amirlopatin

Thinking of Amir Again

I was thinking of Amir again because his English yarzheit is coming up soon on March 25. I saw a story in the Jewish Press about some nice Jewish teenage boys in Israel who were killed in a car accident, and I thought of Amir of course. I was very sad.

Throughout my joys and sorrows in the past year Amir has been with me in my thoughts and hopes and sometimes even in my dreams. I miss him still and always will. My heart still breaks for his mother Sara and for his sister Shoshana and brother Uri and all his friends and family. Their loss is inconsolable and unimagineable.

I had been thinking of Amir because I’m going to a Jewish social action meeting tonight here in New York. I know his spirit will be with me there as we discuss how to tackle the myriad difficult social issues facing our city and what our small Jewish community can contribute toward solving them.

I thought of Amir in a very unexpected context this morning also. I was up surfing the web to do research on the Iraqi democracy struggle and the emerging Lebanese democracy movement. I found many moving young male and female bloggers who were dreaming and acting for freedom in Iraq, Lebanon, Egypt, Bahrain, Kuwait, and Iran.

Then I stumbled across a Saudi blogger who reminded me of Amir. His blog name was Saudi Jeans. He was a 21 year old IT manager named Ahmed. Among one of his many postings was a salute to the Kuwaiti women who were protesting to demand the right to vote and a link to pictures of their protest.

The cultural gap between Jews and Saudi Arabia is about as big as it gets. In Saudi Arabia Jews aren’t even allowed to VISIT the kingdom by law. Men and women are not allowed to interact AT ALL. But still you see that many young Arab men and women share the universal human dream of freedom.

Amir always told me that computers were the wave of the future. And he realized much more than I ever did how much computers could improve human life. Now computers are expanding the possibility for human freedom, self-expression, and democracy in the Arab world in ways that I could never have imagined in my wildest dreams.

From an IM Conversation (

through the wonderful power of Google desktop search tool (I know Amir would love it!), I discovered this little snippet of our IM conversation when I was in Europe a couple of years ago:

Wed Oct 30 21:49:47 2002
[21:55] ibarmash: i’ve noticed myself strangely attracted to eating burger king here
[21:55] AmirLopatin: dont eat beef!
[21:55] ibarmash: i began to understand america’s obsession with fast food
[21:55] ibarmash: hehe
[21:55] AmirLopatin: they have mad cow diesase!
[21:55] AmirLopatin: in europe
[21:55] AmirLopatin: u wil go crazy!
[21:56] ibarmash: too late!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
[21:56] ibarmash: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[21:56] ibarmash: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
[21:56] AmirLopatin: :)so one cow says to the other
[21:56] AmirLopatin: did you hear bessie?
[21:56] AmirLopatin: the rancher over the hill discovered mad cow disease
[21:56] AmirLopatin: in his cows
[21:57] AmirLopatin: they are all going to be killed
[21:57] AmirLopatin: so the other cow replies,
[21:57] AmirLopatin: “good thing we are ducks”!

My Deepest Gratitude

Over the past year, I have developed a powerful love of nature. It took hold days after you were gone.

Because of you Amir, I have a newfound reverence for nature, for people and the world, perspectives, hope, questions…

Because of you walking is magical. Meaning abounds everywhere I look. You enrich my days and have taught me how to live.

From: Phyllis Berkowitz

In march of 2004, shortly before amir’s tragic passing, he came for a friday night shabbos dinner to my home, with his mother. During the evening the animated conversation revolved around what he was doing at stanford. He was very excited about his various projects and the people he was working with. I mentioned that i had started a newsletter called THE FAMILY NEWS in 2003. I published this newsletter as a way of keeping my family, who were in california, israel, and new york connected with one another. I said that i e-mailed and sent a hard copy to everyone participating. Amir said, “why don’t you get a web site?” I said that i did not know how to do it and he said that he would help me. He said that he would call me after shabbos. As it happened i went out early and missed his call.

Not thinking that he remembered, the next morning i called him. But, true to his word, when i listened to my messages, there was his from saturday night, asking when he could come over to work on the web site. Within 5 minutes he was at my house. He set up a web site, got a domain name and downloaded my previous newsletters on to the site. He was extremely patient with me and very kind as i didn’t know some of the basic computer lingo that one with more computer savy would take for granted. He complimented me often and made me feel great. He said that i was a step above his mother(in my computer ability). He had that special twinkle in his beautiful blue eyes and had that way of looking at you shyly, that i will always remember. I, like everyone else he came into contact with during his time with us miss him. May his memory always be a blessing.

Cape Cod

I only met Amir a couple of times through our friend Ben, and my story comes from when we were kids and Amir came out to Cape Cod to spend a week or so with Ben’s family. I have this memory because it was so very funny to me, and I hope that it can bring a smile to someone who reads it. If anyone knows the “The Cape” it was always a bit behind in technology and back in the early 80’s it was far far behind. Watching TV for instance meant spending a good amount of time fidgeting with the rabbit ears on black & white TV.

One day while playing a board game (most likely RISK, which now that I think about it, Amir introduced me to RISK) the TV was on in the background and some Tropicana commercial came on, the ad had a particular scene where they pictured an orange juice glass upside down for a moment. Amir happened to be walking by the TV at that same moment and apparently had had it with the poor reception he had been having. Well, he abruptly starting whaling on the TV cursing it to the extent only an adolescent can. Of course the commercial played on with the glass being turned right side up and Amir walked away pleased with his Fonzie-like fixing of the problem.

Again, I hope this brings a smile.

-Mike

A Mother’s Thoughts

The tears flow non stop as I read the words of praise, words of pain and the words of profound loss echoing around this special young man. Although I knew Amir solely through the eyes of my son, it is through this lens that I was informed of his unique qualities. Amir who touched the lives of so many will live on in those who loved him.

So sad for this immense loss,

Mother of a friend to Amir

I Regret Not Knowing Him Well

I had met Amir on one or two outings and after reading all of these accounts I am sorry I never got to know him. He was an amazing individual from everyone’s descriptions and may we all be inspired by his memory.

-Aimee Ben-Ezra Cohen

Thanksgiving

This Thanksgiving, I have a lot to be thankful for. What can Sara Lopatin be thankful for? Well, if I had children like Uri and Shoshana, I would be thankful for that. And I am thankful to have them as friends.

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